The Energy & Power Of Crystals

For someone who suffers from multiple ailments, I have searched high and low for alternatives for pain and insomnia. These include having massages, ear candling, ionic foot baths, using essential oils, Rheki, Yoga, Meditation, and most recently laying on the floor in agony praying to God, but I found that one didn't work as well as I had hoped. I have also bought special pillows, egg crates for the bed, linen spray that evokes restful sleep, and I tried wearing magnetic bracelet, all with no luck.

I have even paid money to visit a Holistic Healer, because I was so desperate to feel better. I would have paid any amount of money to have the pain eliminated from my body. I wanted a non-medication alternative and I would stop at nothing to find it. I visited my friend, Terri who was a Holistic Healer. I was very sick at the time and was throwing up almost every day. My body was all out of whack, so I called her up and asked her to help me. She used the energy from my body and by asking me questions and placing her hand on my feet, hands, wrists and by holding her hand over my stomach, she was able to get answers from my body. This was weird for me that my debilitating body was speaking to her with its energy, or I should say lack of energy and that there was no hope for me. I was surprised that my sick energy didn't make her tell me to get up and leave. The energy in my body told her that my gallbladder was not working and a few months later I was in surgey having it removed because it had stopped working months before. Terri saved my life.

I also get regular massages. The most wonderful massage I ever got was from a lady named Lisa who was my friend and what I would consider an old soul. She had fire red hair that was curly and it was like I had met her in a former life or something and I felt as if I had known her for years. I liked that strange connection I felt when I met her. I was relaxed and at ease.

I laid on the massage table and above the table was a skylight. The room was dark and cool and it started to rain. The tapping of rain on the skylight and the smell of spearmint and lavender comforted me and I began to go into this place inside me that was calm and peaceful. I was also very relaxing and healing for me. I think it was the mixture of essential oils, rain and that I had finally found a massuse that could pull the pain out of my body. This is when I realized that energy healing existed. To me anyway, it was real and I believed that it would help heal me from within.


A few months ago, I stumbled across a packet of healing crystals that came in a decorate box along with a book on the power of crystal healing. I figured it was worth the $10.00 and worth a try. The box contained 10 healing crystals which were supposed to balance the chakras in my body to promote balance and healing.

The word Chakra is derived from the Sanskrit word meaning "wheel." Chakras are wheels of continuous energy that rotate at different centers of our body. It begins at the base of the spine and finishes at the top of the head. Each Chakra is stimulated by its own color and each crystal emulates this energy. The colors of the stones are red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo, and violet.



Our Chakra wheels of colors vary depending on our physical conditions, energy levels, disease and stress. This made me think that I must be a dull canvas of white so I needed to get all my colors on the board or at least find a few of them. The crystals are intended to heal you and help balance your chakras. Below I have listed each of the ten crystals and a bit about each stone's intended effects.

1. Yellow Moonstone- This crystal attracts love, is good for hormone imbalances and menstural cramps.
2. Black Obsidian- This crystal is good for emotional cleansing and releasing old, harmful habits.
3. Rose Quartz- This crystal brings love into your life, it's good for heart disease, the blood and circulation. It also helps keep peace and happiness in relationships.
4. Dark Blue Sodalite- This crystal helps heal or release negative emotions such as anxiety, nervousness, anger, fear, guilt, or shame. It also brings peaceful sleep when put under the pillow while sleeping.
5. Tiger's Eye- This crystal helps keep your thoughts clear, specific and in the realm of reality. It also helps with focus, concentration.
6. Purple Amethyst- This crystal is useful in calming stress and healing addictions.
7. Soft Yellow Calcite- This crystal cleanses the energy field and is good for meditation.
8. Soft Brown Carmelian- This crystal ground your energy and focuses your attention into the present, thus giving you personal power, also encourages you and gives your endurance.
9. Green Aventurine- This crystal strengthens intuition, eyesight and foresight. It also brings you good luck.
10. Clear Quartz- This crustal is the MOTHER OF ALL STONES. It's a receiver, amplifier, conductor and generator of energy. It's linked with good health, balance, healing, meditation, knowledge, clear thinking and protection from outside influences.

So after careful study of all the crystals, I was confused as hell and knew I needed all the crystals to heal me but figures I need the mother of all of them so I began with the Clear Quartz.

I lay on the floor in a quiet room. I had to believe that this crystal would help balance my chakras promoting health and a sense of well being. I laid on the floor held the clear stone in the palm of my left hand because its believed that the spirits travel from left to right. I waited, and waited and waited and thought that maybe my spirit energy was confused and didn't ask for directions. I tried to speak to the Crystal and asked it nicely to make my back pain go away and to help me feel better. It said to listen to your body and you can hear what its telling you and that you must trust and follow your own intuitions.

After twenty minutes, and a sweaty palm of Clear Quartz later, all I felt was the urge to pee and a pain in my lower back. Wonder what I did wrong? My boyfriend came into the room and looked at me as if I had gone to lala land. I continued to seek energy but I have to say so far, not much has happened. It was a neat experience and I will continue to work on balancing my chakras, but for now, I'll stick with Imodium and water.

Tomorrow I am having Acupuncture for the first time so maybe that will be the thing that works the best, I'll tell you all about that one tomorrow.

Insomnia Cures

Did you know that 70 million Americans suffer from sleep disorders and at least 32 million of those people suffer from Insomnia? Insomnia is defined by Merriam-Webster's dictionary as "prolonged and usually abnormal inability to obtain adequate sleep." (circa 1623-www.merriamwebster.com)

I also researched Insomnia online and found out that out of people age 15-55, 20-40% encounter insomnia problems during a year time and 10 million people have to take medications for insomnia. I also learned that a person with insomnia only sleeps six hours of less daily and that Americans sleep 20% less than we did 100 years ago?
(www.sleepcottage.com/insomnia-stats/)

I think this last bit of information is totally true, because we have become a nation of technology with cell phones, computers, I-pads and video games. 100 years ago, people were too busy staking their land, building their houses, raising families, hunting for food and hanging the clothes on the line to dry. Children played outside in fresh air, swaying from fat, oak trees and when the day was done, they were so exhausted that they never had problems with sleep.

Our society now is so much more mentally challenged and we have so much shit floating around in our heads at night that we have to take a pill to shut off the receptors. It's like taking a "shut the hell up so I can sleep pill." I am one of those people. Doctors believe that Fibromyalgia is caused by receptors in the brain that tell your body (nerves) constantly that you're in pain and we have to take a pill so we can shut them up and get some much needed rest.

The top three countries with Insomnia sufferers are:
1. The United States (too many Starbucks is my reason why)
2. Germany (too much rich food and learning that language is enough to make me not sleep) and
3. The United Kingdom

I decided to poll all my friends to see how they pass the time when dealing with Insomnia.
I have listed the responses in order:
1. Read a book
2. Get on facebook
3. Watch television
4. Relaxation and/or meditation (on I-phone and/or cell phone)
5. Toss and turn
6. Listen to music and/or book on CD
7. Write
8. Listen to Dr. Weil Meditation program
9. Sort our problems in their head
10.Do a crossword puzzle
11.Eat ice cream and
12 Iron

So whether you're reading a book, listening to meditation, watching TV, or just tossing and turning, know that you're not alone and feel better knowing that at least 32 million other people are doing that same exact thing. This got me thinking that maybe I should plan a rave party and call it the Insomnia Rave and all my friends who find themselves up at 3am can come over to my rave and we can move to the beat and sweat out the insomnia. What a great party that would be!

Searching For Sleep

It's typical for people with Fibromyalgia to suffer from Insomnia or lack of sleep. Many nights for me are spent tossing, turning and searching in the darkness for sleep. On average, I am only asleep about two to three hours at one time and then keep waking up. I wake up, roll over, squint at the clock and count to myself, "only two more hours of sleep," or I say "Damn, only ten more minutes of sleep," and then I do my best to go back to sleep.

I feel like a soldier trenched in the weight on my back, night vision goggles on, gun in hand, wading in mud for sleep. I know it's there, right around the corner, but I'm afraid if I sneak up on it too soon, it will run far away and I may not find it for days. So I crouch low down to the ground, silent in the night and there beyond the moon in the sky, I think I see it, but them again without my contacts in, it's a faint black blob, but I still know it's there.

I also search for sleep in my pillow hoping it knows the trick and can help or I change the small blanket over my comforter, because sometimes I need a certain comforter weight to sleep well. I also turn the temperature down close to 68 degrees so I can snuggle under the covers. Maybe sleep is under the covers? Who knows, but last night as I searched there, all I found was a penny and my boyfriend farted. But no sleep.

So I wait, sitting up in bed, staring into the nothingness, waiting for you to come to me, to dust my eyes with "sand man" dust and sometimes I find myself softly singing the tune to you lulling you to come to me,

"Mr. Sandman, bring me a dream, make him the cutest
that I've ever seen."

Then after that I find myself singing all the fifties songs I can think of and yesterday I watched the movie Mermaids, so I started singing,

"Does he love me? I wanna know, How can I tell if he loves me so? Is it in his kiss?"

This proved to be a hopeless endeavor, so I just gave-up and waited for morning to come singing tunes to myself. Tomorrow I'm going to download the whole Mermaids Soundtrack, because it rocks!

Sleep- I want you! I need you. I can't get enough of you. I deserve you, so why won't you let me in your splendor, like an infant just off the breast, full of warm milk, eyes slowly closing, heavy breaths entering sleepy land and hands limp with dream. I want that kind of sleep, warm, happy, a deep restful sleep, where you and the bed become one. I imagine it's like lying on a big, puffy cloud, cradling me for at least 8-10 hours in its blue, hypnotic haze.

Traveling with IBS

I've been thinking a lot lately about the hassles of traveling when one suffers from IBS. I think about this a lot during the summer because this is the glorious time for vacations, long rides in the car, trips to far-off destinations and long walks on the beach. I am reminded of a time just last year when a traveling trip went horribly wrong and IBS was the culprit. It's embarrassing to say the least, but maybe once you read about it, you can relate. So here is my humiliating tale of traveler's woe.

Last fall, my boyfriend got stuck without a ride in Myrtle Beach. I had just enjoyed a dinner of greasy food and a large iced tea and was gearing up for a night of watching movies and enjoying a nice evening alone, when the phone rang at 9pm.
Craig needed me to pick him up. Now mind you, Myrtle Beach was close to four hours away and not particularly something I wanted to do. I'm not sure why I didn't just make him take the bus (probably because that thought didn't cross my mind). I put on my comfy driving clothes, grabbed our dog for safety, put gas in the car, grabbed a roll of TP (just in case) and headed down the lonely stretch of country road toward the beach.

About forty-five minutes into my journey, just me and the dog, my stomach started rumbling and doing its usual flip-flop. I thought it was just nerves because I don't enjoy driving at night and I would be driving into bumfuck. If you saw some of the areas you have to go, visions of any scary movie would come to mind.

A few moments later the urge to vomit came over me and I had to lurch the car onto the side of the road and wretched for ten minutes while the dog looked at me in horror. Whatever greasy meal I had eaten was now out of me or so I thought. I pulled myself together and made it another thirty minutes into a tiny town where I threw up again this time in a park barely having enough time to open the car door. Next I threw up another thirty minutes down the way in a church parking lot. I was a hot mess and crying and I was already half-way to the beach, so there was no way I was leaving Craig without a ride. I had come this far, I just had to keep going. I started downing Pepto pills and praying that I would not throw up anymore. The dog I think was worried about me. he kept looking at me with funny looks.

Well after four Pepto pills and a few sips of coke, guess what happened? No, not puking this time, just imagine. It was already midnight and I was driving down a two lane road in the middle of freaking nowhere when the urge to go to the bathroom was so severe that I wasn't sure what I was going to do, so I once again lurched the car over to the shoulder of the road, turned the headlights off, pushed the dog in the back seat and jumped in the passenger seat, barely getting my butt out the car door before all hell broke loose. So as embarrassing as it is to be reminded actually happened to me, it's even more embarrassing that I'm actually telling you all about it right now.

Even though I was alone on a desolate stretch of wood with my ass hanging out the side of the door, an actual big truck was coming right this way. First I was scared he would see me with my ass hanging out the car door and then I was so scared he would think I needed help so I cleaned up as fast as I could and jumped out the car and headed over to the driver side to get back in and head to the beach.

Thinking that my night could get no worse, it did. I went to pull the door handle to get in my side of the car and it was locked. To make matters worse, the car was running with my cell phone and dog inside. How the hell did I manage to get myself into this predicament? Ahh, yes I remember now, I have freaking IBS and today it was beating the shit out of me, literally from all ends. I just broke down and cried in the middle of the freaking night with my dog pressing his face up to the window looking at me like I was in sane.

Then I began to think of all the horror movies that I had watched and I thought about all the jethro-looking men in trucks that would come kidnap me and all that would be left would be my running car, a barking dog and pile of shit next to it. Maybe the police would come and think that I had run away from the embarrassment alone. When he saw what had taken place he would have laughed at me, then I would be the laughing stock of Hicksville.

I looked up to the heaven and the stars, put my hands in the air and yelled REALLY! Then I prayed that there was a rock somewhere because I was not going to let IBS win this time. I would find a way to get in that car if I had to use my damn shoe to break the window. I walked over to the other side of the car avoiding you know what and HAIL MARY, the passenger door was not all the way shut, so I jumped for joy, jumped over my shit and jumped back in my car and cried even harder, I was just so happy to be back in my car. I had forgotten that I could still be kidnapped but I had hoped the stench of my shit would be both a killer and bear deterrent.

I started back on the road and one hour and thirty minutes later, I hugged my boyfriend and told him about my incredible story of what I had to go through and four hours after that, we finally made it back home. I was exhausted, and annoyed and so happy to be home. I told Craig if that ever happened again, he better learn to hitchhike, cause this ass ain't going to pick him up no matter what.
But Looking back on now, I really do believe that ship happens and you just have to learn to deal with it, the good, bad and the super ugly trips to hell and back.

Daymares

Today I had a daymare. What you ask is a daymare. It's like a nightmare, but since I never sleep it's a nightmare that happens in the middle of the day.

This morning, I was totally exhausted from no sleep last night and after drinking a cup of hot tea followed by a cup of coffee, I was still feeling drained. Trying my best to pay attention to the task at hand, but off in this drift-away land, it happened. A minute ago I was typing and working on brochures and then moments later, my leg tapping the side of my desk was the daymare. I was now wide awake, half jittery from the coffee and scared as hell!

A horrible, realization came over me and I realized that if my boyfriend were to ever leave me for another woman, I would be single and in flashing lights I saw my classified ad in the singles section. My mouth flew open; I let out a gasp and became totally freaked. I thought to myself, this can never happen, ever!!

It read like this
"Single, mid-thirties, likes short walks on the beach, back massages, caffeine, regular doses of pills, likes complaining, and enjoys food as longs as it's doesn't make me shit. Also likes sex as long as it's in the position I desire, hot bubble baths and long, luxurious naps. Dislikes sitting too long, going out, hours of sex, working, being responsible, staying up late, doing drugs, drinking, running, exercising and chores."

It was in this daymare, that I realized if I were ever single again, I would have not one, but at least twelve strikes against me.
So it was apparent that I would never get another man and as I sat there newly awakened from this daymare, I wanted to cry.

I never used to be that person. I mean, I never saw myself over thirty, let alone, over thirty, un-married, no kids and living with not one, but two chronic illnesses. And now here I was with this huge, fat reality check on my forehead staring me in the face. The face where, just a few weeks ago, I found a hair growing from my chin and several new gray hairs that emerged from my "needs to be dyed" hair.

I know some people say that being an adult and being over thirty sucks, but this is freaking ridiculous and I think I would rather have nightmares, because at least when I wake up from them, I can go back to sleep, and sometimes you forget them all together, but with daymares, It's only 11am and I have six more hours of work to do and lots of deadlines.

Destinations

Some people while driving, text, talk on their cells, sing, or speed delightfully toward their next destination. They have no worry, no fear, and no nerves. The just enjoy traveling the open road, being adventurous and not caring what lies around the next curve or mountain. They can take off their watches, steer the car toward miles of country and be glad that the sky is blue and the weather is grande.
This used to be me. I loved getting in the car and traveling whether it was for twenty minutes, five hours or just around the block. There was something about being in control and steering the car toward something, a goal, a destination, a party, or even to nowhere. Lazy summer afternoons were spent riding and gazing at country, beautiful trees, cotton fields and nature. It was a beautiful time. My mom and I used to travel by car to Vermont each fall to see Grandma.



Vermont is the most beautiful scenery I have ever seen, lush, green pastures dotted with cobalt blue Silos, cows grazing in pastures and miles of nothing but beauty. It was and is still breathtaking to me. The fall gave way to wet leaves and the distant smell of maple syrup and wheat lingered on your tongue.

When I first started dating my boyfriend, he lived in his car. His clothes were neatly organized in rows in his trunk and we spent many of those first few years together driving in the country, the city and the outskirts of towns or a quick trip to the beach. After work, we grabbed a bite to eat, took off the T-tops in his 87’ MR2 and cruised down long, winding, desolate roads. We stopped in lonely tobacco fields and walked around for hours exploring old barns and enjoying the fresh air on our virgin cheeks. I felt alive and in love. Those are glorious memories for me, that I always think back on and smile.

My problem is that since I developed IBS and Fibromyalgia, these drives no longer are pleasant, blissful moments, but plotted and planned out itineraries that involve bathrooms stops, breaks and maps. I count miles between exits and always look to see what bathrooms, restaurants and gas stations each exit has. Sometimes when my tummy is giving me fits, I wonder if I should have stopped just then and I hope that I can make it to the next exit. The “just jumping in the car” moments I fear are gone forever. I want them back. I want to gladly jump in the car with my sweetie and hit the open road and not find myself counting miles, and minutes until the next “destination.” I want to sit on the beach anywhere where no one goes so we can sit alone together, but instead I have to sit near the public restroom, just in case. Why? Because IBS doesn’t care if it’s 63 miles to a rest stop or if one is just up ahead. It doesn’t wait for stoplights or traffic on the highway and it sure as hell doesn’t care about trains. It has a mind of its own and it’s getting in my way. And it’s pissing me off.

I want to enjoy destinations again. I want to enjoy open roads, sitting in the Daffodil field until the sun has left and it’s just the two of us under the moonlight.



I don’t want to get up and leave but stay there with you for hours and once again it can be like it was when your hand was in mine and we went to the schoolyard playground and swung on the swings until our legs hurt till 2am. I want to camp with you again, in a big tent, nowhere near a bathroom, roasting marshmallows over a crackling fire and laughing with you until my belly hurts, but in a good way.

This is what I want and I will get it back. So open roads, cotton fields and desolate beaches, you better wait for me, because I’m going to come back real soon. Just writing this makes me want to grab the picnic basket and big beach towel with the blue dolphin, pack the trunk, pop a couple Imodium and play hookie tomorrow.